Hey WordPress family!
It’s been a while since I last blogged. Life has been crazy busy and God has been doing some incredible things.
I would like to give you all an update on the last four months.
Well, to start, I resigned from a position that I loved and moved away from the students that brought me great joy. I loved working as a youth pastor at the church that I was serving. I couldn’t ask for a better bunch of students, parents, or congregation! It was a shocker to me to have God knock me on my butt and tell me “Chris, you’ve done all I want you to do here!”
So let’s just say that there were a few weeks of borderline depression- because I left the students I loved, the ministry I have spent so much time investing in, and the position of leadership that I was in. God had been doing a work in my heart for well over a year. He has been stretching me to be more than I could ever be on my own.
I still have to say that my heart is for student ministry and I have every intent to proceed in the future, but God has to finish the work that He has started.
After leaving the church, I have had several ups and downs. Several ministries that I had contact with had started asking me to come join them in their mission. As an attempt to figure out God’s leading, I checked out each of them. To my surprise, these opportunities turned into life lessons. At each door that I approached, God taught me a new lesson. Some of the lessons where about His soveriegnty, while others were about showing me my own sin. So, to say that the last four months has been a journey would be an understatement, and to say that this journey is over would be foolish.
So, through God teaching me several lessons and giving me some awesome opportunities to meet some great men of the faith, I have been lead to a time of refreshment and revision. After turning down several positions and going in a completely unexpected direction, God has provided a surreal level of peace.
Up until about 3 weeks ago, my life has revolved around the fact that God had asked me to do ministry. My life’s purpose has been to reach a level of competence in a field that I felt God Himself had directed me into. Today, I sit unemployed and still with no idea of the future, but God is good. What I am learning is that even though ministry may be a great thing and the building of the Kingdom may be the call of the Church, neglecting my responsibilities are not.
Let me explain: The responsibilities that I am talking about are twofold. 1) A calling to ministry should never supercede a calling to Christ. I’m learning that for us pastor types, guys who study ministry methods and theology all day, ministry can become somewhat of an idol. What I am saying is that we can come to love working for God more than loving God. I’m not sure that I could say that I’ve been loving ministry more than God, but I can definitely say that God has made me very aware of this idol in the past few weeks.
I have a desire to fulfill God’s call on my life and this desire is seeded deep in my soul. I believe that God has created me for this purpose and has equipped me to fulfill this calling, BUT that is not the sole purpose of my existence. What God wants just as much as me doing ministry is for me to enjoy Him! He wants a relationship with me, just as much as He wants a relationship with those who do not yet know Him.
Of course, I’ve believed this. Heck, I’ve been teaching this for the past 3 years of ministry! I guess, God decided it was time for me to go back to the basics again.
So on to the second thing: 2) I have a calling to my wife, way before I have a calling to the Church. I love Christ’s Church and my deepest desire is to see God’s people following God, but more than my heart of the church, I need to have a heart for my woman!
Now, if you’ve been around me for more than 5 minutes you’ve heard me talk a lot about my hott wife! I love my woman with all of my heart! She is the greatest thing I’ve ever gotten and way more than I ever deserved. My wife is the “cotton” to my “candy,” the “light” to my “day,” and the “sweet” to my “tea!” What I’m trying to get across is “I love her!”
But sometime affection of the heart can get sidetracked because of the burdens of ministry. My wife and I both feel that we have a great marriage and that I have been a great husband (these are her words). But from time to time, I’ve had more of an affection for my call, than my wife- which is not of God!
Even though God has called me to serve His people, He’s called me first to love, date, hold, talk late into the night, cook for, and clean for my woman. I’m called to be a Godly man before I’m called to be a “Man of God.”
So, for this season of our life- whether it’s short or long- I’m going to be sitting at the feet of Jesus and dating the hottest woman alive!